well going to Kentucky tomorrow. technically today at 7am and is that going to be a long ride. but that's not the hardest/oddest part about it. the thing is I haven't seen much less talked to anybody outside of my immediate family in over a year. I hope them seeing me doesn't shock them into a heart attack or something. I guess that'd be like a clown crying or something. one thing is for sure I will be eating like a god or at least somebody in food heaven. so my main point to all of this babbling, I won't have any updates till I return on Sat at earliest. they don't believe in the internet up there, nah just kidding.

not sure if I mentioned this earlier, may have been over IM to somebody, but I thought I'd be nice and ask my mom if she'd prefer I not wear my tongue ring. oh and melanie, to answer you question: yes. ok so on with the show, she thinks that'd be a good idea so they wouldn't have to hear about it later. man, and I was hoping for some excitement. you see, my mom's side of the family is more old school/old fashioned than we are. and that kind of thing just wouldn't go over to well. but I always knew we were the black sheep of the family reunions. my dad's side basically consists of his mother. he has a brother but they live in wisconsin so as you can guess we hardly ever see them. wish I could though. he seems like the type of uncle I'd like.

moving on. oh my god, I can't believe what I just found. I got hungry so went looking for food. oh I'm at my parents' house by the way. looking in the cabinet, I think I see the word 'bacon' but on a cracker box, how can this be? these crackers are bacon flavored. and if you know me, you know how much I LOVE bacon. got some cheese and now going to town on some bacon crackers. mmm mmm good. only thing to make this better would be some smoked cheddar instead of regular. but I'll manage. oh man. oh and before I forget, yes melanie, Hey Mercedes was great. they kicked my ass. and I'd let them do it again. what a live performance, just wish I had money to buy the cds. but I think it'll be ok because a friend is going to let me borrow hers to burn.

why do I let girls run my life? am I that easy and willing or just a robot looking for love? I mean really. I know one day I'll find that 'someone' or rediscover that one if I already know her. but why not now? save me.. hell the both us the heart ache and loneliness. then again it's these trials that make us who we are and able to recognize that she is for me and me for her.

hehe, 'she' and 'her' are names I gave two characters in a game I'm playing right now. all the characters have pronoun names so it makes it more interesting. this is another thing running/ruining my life. a couple weeks ago I took all my old playstation games back to play on my PS2. bad idea. one of them was Final Fantasy VII. hmmm, I'm a dork/loser/geek but I love it so much. I'd have to say that this is the only game that I have almost cried over. is that sad (that I actually almost cried over a video game)?

mmmmmmmm bacon crackers and cheese mmmmmm

"I wanna hang onto something That won't break away or fall apart Like the pieces of my heart"